When I started this blog, I knew that despite my best efforts I would forget to update, and so it comes as no surprise that it's been three weeks since my last post. It has been, in fact, a very interesting three weeks, so I need to just take a moment to figure out what to talk about first. The frustration of living at home and having no privacy? The lack of money? The pro-wrestler I started dating two weeks ago?
Yes, I said pro-wrestler. As in tights, screaming into a microphone, staged fights PRO-FUCKING-WRESTLER. Finally, a man who is not only bigger than me, but can, in fact, pick me up and toss me across a room without batting an eye. I'd swoon, but I left my whalebone corset and smelling salts back in 1885.
Honestly though, he's pretty awesome. Definitely different from the type of person I usually date. For one, he's an adult, 8 years my senior and happy in a steady, very well paying job in IT. Secondly he's not rail thin and riddled with emotional issues like a soda can on a redneck's fence. For another, despite what you might think when I say "pro-wrestler," he is a kind, charming, and brilliant human being. The brilliance can be proved by the fact that he is a bona fide member of MENSA, the kind and charming you'll just have to take at my word. Of course, it's very likely I may be laughing to hard to tell you, because he's also hilariously funny.
Not everything is wine and roses, however. He does, like every other human being, have his downsides. For one, he's a divorcee, with two daughters of his own. Although they don't live with him, it has been a new experience for me to negotiate dating someone with that much life experience under their belt. I sometimes feel so immature compared to him, but only in a strange sort of way. Obviously I am glad I never had children, but since it's a part of his life that I don't really understand, but takes up so much of his time, I wonder how much we can really share with each other. Also, he snores like a drunken bull moose.
It's been strange trying to do the dating dance while living at home. I don't really have a place of my own to bring him, and driving out to Sacramento all the time to go to his place is fine, but I miss being able to be in my own comfort zone. After having lived alone for so long, and being so used to defining my own hours, food, and when and where in my house I have sex, having to let someone else dictate those things is incredibly frustrating. I am overwhelmingly thankful to my folks for letting me stay with them while I am broke and in debt, but the trade-off is hard.
I've also been missing New York a lot in the last few weeks. Coming back to a small town after the excitement and drama of the capital of the world is just... heartbreaking. I really wasn't ready to leave New York yet. I feel like I had so much still to do there... but now I just have to dial everything down to living at home in Davis and drinking my pain away with the townies.
Wow... now I'm fucking depressed. I'm gonna go see what the townies are doing.
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